no fever but no strength at all..cant get pccc info into my brain =S feel so terrible when u tried to study but ur body just seems to be unwilling to obey you...sadded...tml 8am lesson, gonna welcome another formal report when i haven done with the previous one =S mst is coming n i haven got anytime to revise....

some random feelings...
it has been 6 years...but somethings are still kept deep inside...n i dun wish to bring it out again...hope it is buried deep enough...
i realise i haven change much these yrs....still as short as before...hairstyle almost the same too...
while others changed alot till i couldnt regconise...

why of all, thsi time?

haiis, toe infection got mii sick now...feeling terrible...cant do my reports n study for test...
please let mii recover soon! haiis.

i hope it is not true...
somethings are better not to be known...

sometimes, we cared too much about what others think and eventually we behaved like another person without realising this change....

finally i can blog!!!!
after sooooooo long!
exams were over long ago...lols...
i wasn't happy at all like last time after the last paper..instead the only thing i know is I AM VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY TIRED!!!!! nth can decribe my tiredness then. i only slept one hr before the last paper starts...it was horribly done...nt just this paper but ALL. despite sacrificing my sleeping time, i still nv get what i want...too bad... the only thing i can console myself is to tell myself i have not put in enough effort thats why i dont deserve to score well. ok feel better now. nvm, its over le. i shall nt think abt it again. i doubt i would have the courage to face the truth when my resluts are out. arghhh....dun think dun think >.< go away!

ok! so after the last paper, we went to watch "Alice in the wonderland" but nt the 3D one. it was quite a nice movie. nth very amazing n nth very disappointing. haha. overall it was ok. but there are some funny parts which make mii laugh like anything. esp the twins, they're so cute lah! n the madhatter part was quite touching.haha. after the movie we went to walk ard PS then went for steamboat at crystal jade, full to the max. n that's the time my fever symptom show. i had a really bad headache...it was so pain until the things around mii was blur, very blur. i stared at the food with a blank mind, the feeling was horrible. then when our buffet session was ending, i feel much better suddenly. the pain has subsided abt 3/4. i was damn happy then.haha.but i dun think anyone noticed that.lol. haha. that's the end of the day.

as compared to yr1, that day to me seems to be a very normal day becos the mood for celebration, eat, drink and play has gone...maybe i dun look forward to this holiday at all. i dont know the exact feeling actually. confused. life seems to have come to an end. maybe i should add a comma instead of a fullstop to my life, if nt, i'm afraid that i might go into depression. hope i dun have this feeling again after i "enjoyed" my holidays. ok, enough of those sad things.

sat went to my cousin house n i stayed there till today. just came back in the afternoon. they teach mii how to play some songs using the piano.haha! other than that i spent my time there either on eating, sleeping or reading. omg. so lazy lah. haha ops. but i was sick on the second day of my stay...had a bad headache again! n followed by a bad flu which last till today. omg. i feel like my body is dying. lol. i rather i have a fever which i only need to suffer for 2 days instead of now, having flu n nt recovering after so many days. haiis. why isnt there is happy thing that can make mii feel happy?? wondering.....

finally matsc case study is over and i'm clear of presentations..yesterday slept for 2 hrs plus and went to sch today...slept during PI lesson while the lecturer was busy dl-ing her video. OMG.this is the first time i really slept in class...i was really too tired despite finished my whole bottle of water, i still feel sleepy sia...cmi. and throughout the lesson i was opening and closing my eyes continueously. tt feeling was damn xin ku...wan to sleep but cant, wan to listen but nth goes in. arghh! sometimes i really hate myself for doing my work so slowly and think so slowly when the lecturer is explaining. HATE IT when i cant absorb during class. cos everytime after the day has ended, i would end up forgetting everything. HATE MYSELF FOR THAT. haiis! felt so inferior=(
since this sem starts, i nv felt satisfied with my work for once. dunno why. and i'm damn fustrated over this. haiis.

nxt week will be having two test and need to hand up two datasheets...
then the following week another two test (one is exam)...and is the deadline for formal report too...so dead.
then will have one week for study (includes 3 days CNY =( ) and its the end sem exam! omg is damn damn damn fast and i really had no time to revise.
Hope i can make it....

haiis...exams are coming again....
time past so fast even before i can react to it...haiis.
i began to miss my life in year one and two already...
year3 to me is a nightmare tt i have been escaping from...n now its time to face the reality...feeling so lost and sad. haiis.
i'm afraid i cant cope for this end sem exam.i haven started studying yet...
i wanted to have time to study so badly but i just dun have the time...
still have lots of datasheets to complete and also formal report...
i cannot score badly again this time, i cant afford to do so...if not i will never have the chance...
i'm really scared...

feeling tired already...
i dunno why am i so stupid...
i wan to get things done but i just coudn't do it fast...
everyday, i have been thinking what should assignment should i complete today after sch...
but it is ALWAYS half finised. i'm so disappointed in myself. and i feel so sad about my results and i dunno why. everyday i got the fear of missing out important things from lessons...fear of not able to finish the work i'm supposed to do and implicate my friends...fear of my results...fear of not able to understand my work...fear of not able to do tutorials...and i dunno why and how i felt this way. i felt the mst results were so fake and not mine.
i wan to do a good job but i am just so stupid. of so many things i have done, none make mii satisfied and none seems good work to me. =( i'm scared of everything now.

sianness and double sianness

haiis...
sch just started nt long..its ony the third day
and assignments seems to be piled up alr =(
i doubt i can survive any longer.
so many things due on the same week.
pressed for time and stressed up!
=(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((